God and the Simpsons

Bart: All right! I've sat through Mercy and I sat through Forgiveness; finally we get to the good stuff!

Homer: Everybody's a sinner, except this guy!

Bart: Dear God, we paid for all this food ourselves, so thanks for nothing.

Homer: Dear Lord thank you for this microwave bounty, even though we don't deserve it. I mean...our kids are uncontrollable hellions. Pardon my French, but they act like savages! Did You see them at the picnic? Of course You did; You're everywhere, You're omnivorous. O Lord! Why did you spite me with this family?!

Marge: Dear Lord, if you spare this town from becoming a smoking hole in the ground, I'll try to be a better Christian. I don't know what I can do...Mmm...oh, the next time there's a canned food drive, I'll give the poor something they'll actually like instead of old lima beans and pumpkin mix.

Homer: God, if you really are a God, you'll get me tickets to that game.

advertisement: In honor of the birth of our savior, Try-N-Save is open all Christmas.

Bart: Christmas is a time when people of all religions come together to worship Jesus Christ.

(When listening to "You Light Up my Life")
Homer: I bet the guy she was singing that about was real happy.
Marge: Well, actually, she was singing about God.
Homer: Oh, well, He's always happy. No, wait, He's always mad...

Homer: The Lord is vengeful. O Spiteful One, show me who to smite and he shall be smoten!

Bart: I'm Bart Simpson, who the Hell are you?

Source:
http://www.snpp.com/other/papers/gb.paper.html